The Martin Journey to Ethiopia

Our One Year Anniversary!

2010-04-21T19:43:00.000-07:00

On Sunday we threw a huge "Adoption Day/ Belated 2nd Birthday" party for Amani. We must have had between 50 and 60 people come to our home to celebrate our amazing little guy with us. We had our local Ethiopian restaurant cater for us so that friends and family could taste the wonderful food. We took up a collection for Numan Orphanage and raised almost $300. Bret, the kiddos and I all wore our traditional Ethiopian outfits and got some great family photos. I had hoped that the party would also be an "End of Chemotherapy" celebration - but we are praying for that to happen soon.

I was remembering the day we landed in San Francisco, and how I had never been so happy to be standing on the ground in America. We had an amazing trip, but it was almost three weeks long and I was so homesick. I was so done flying. I was so done with blow-out diapers. I was so done with not having my husband or children with me. I ached for the familiar. I wanted to kiss the ground when we landed. As I stood in the customs line with my precious little guy in the Ergo, I was finally safe enough to let my wall down and it hit me like a ton of bricks. Not only did the emotions start flowing, but I got sicker than I have been in my whole life. I had to get down on my knees as I waited for our turn. I was going to pass out. The room was spinning. I was sweating. That loud hum was filling my ears. I knew I had to make it through that long line to make it to my family on the other side. I barely made it, but I did make it. I collapsed into my husband's arms. Cried into the hair of my four beautiful children who had lived for three weeks with out me. I made it home. Passed off a thankfully happy, instantly at home baby, and went into a dark bedroom for three days. I took Cipro, vomited, cramped, and used the toilet often (sorry!). I worried about Amani and how I was probably messing him up for the rest of his life - but it was a fog of illness that I couldn't break through. After three days I reentered the land of the living and everyone was fine. They weren't scarred for life, and we moved on, becoming a family of seven.

The memory is so fresh and so filled with pain and elation. It has taken me until this marker of one year to really let myself go back and remember exactly how our homecoming went down. :)

Back to UCSF

2010-04-12T09:02:00.001-07:00

I realized this morning that I had updated our status on Facebook, but not here on the blog. The last thing I said was that the oncologists were giving the lump on his head a week to see what would happen. Well, what happened was that the lump got bigger and more painful. By Saturday it was so bad that we called the doctor on call and they told us to start him on a round of prednisone. At that point we were pretty sure that our Tuesday appointment was going to be an iv chemotherapy visit - and it was. On Tuesday we started all over again, for the third time. He is back to three oral medications daily and iv meds once a week in clinic at UCSF. We are very disappointed but not shocked. His molluscum is getting worse already even though its only been a few days. It was really clearing up on his face, but now he is starting to get a bunch more around his eyes. His sleep is hard right now and his appetite is diminishing - but the kiddo is happy most of the time.

The doctor says we will be at this round for 4-6 months and then we will see. I have taken him to every appointment for the last 10 months with the exception of one. I have asked Bret to take him this week. I just need a little break from the children's oncology clinic. It can be such a sad place. I am going to take Av, Olivia & Jordan rollerskating.

Change....Again

2010-03-31T08:26:00.000-07:00

So right after I posted our great news, yesterday we woke up to a painful lump on the back of Amani's head. I felt so numb. We had been told this was what we should expect, but somewhere in the back of my mind I had believed we were done with it.

So I had to call UCSF and they wanted us to come right in so they could x-ray the spot. I scrambled to get the kids taken care of on a day where we had concert choir, track, swimming and rehearsal to get to. Amani and I headed down to San Francisco.

They sent us to x-ray when we got there. UCSF is a huge teaching hosiptal, yet the x-ray technicians recognize us. We have been in there a lot - and Amani makes an impression everywhere he goes! Amani is the most cooperative patient in all aspects of his treatemnt - x-rays seem to be the exception. He despises being held down and made to keep still. Who can blame him? Needless to say, the x-ray process was long, loud, teary, and exhausting for both of us. We finally got the pictures and went back down to the oncology clinic.

His doctor looked at the x-rays and said there is a lesion, but the tech thinks it was there before and hasn't gotten much bigger. They are not sure why the soft tissue is having such a big reaction. Protocol is to start up another 6 week intensive treatement and a milder treatment for another 3-6 months. She said because we had an appointment next week to get his port flushed, and because the bone didn't seem to be too thin, we could wait another week and see what happens. We will go back in next Tuesday and find out what we are in for, or not in for!

In the end it was better news than I had hoped but I feel so drained and sad. His face is just starting to clear up. His little body has been so slammed for so long. Maybe the week will bring a miracle. we will take all the prayers we can get.

Done! (At least for now)

2010-03-24T13:17:00.000-07:00

Our latest and greatest news, (as we approach our one year anniversary of becoming a family of seven), is that we are done with chemo! It may not be forever, but we are hopeful. Our little trooper has been bombarded with chemicals, oral meds, scans, x-rays, needles, biopsies, surgeries and more since last June. Poor little guy had only been home for 6 weeks when this whole thing started. We are thrilled. He has been chemo free for about six weeks now and he is doing great. The molluscum is doing odd things on his face, like bleeding and scabbing, but we are hoping that is because it is leaving. I am so excited that his body is getting a break. We will be going to UCSF once a month for his port to be flushed and for them to look at him and make sure he doesn't have an lumps or pain - and everytime it looks good - we are free for another month!

Jordan's Nap

2010-01-03T13:44:00.000-08:00

The kids have had some very late nights this week and they are all very tired. I usually try to have about an hour of "quiet time" for them while the baby is napping. Today Jordan was so grumpy and weepy that he lost it when I said it was time for "quiet time". I felt bad for him. He was devastated. I walked him to his room and showed him that he could play with Legos or his new magic set. I offered about ten suggestions and then started to leave. As I was closing the door I said, "You could also lay down and take a little rest." Oh, sure! But a mom has to try. I knew that was what he needed but I didn't feel inspired to force the issue. I waited an hour and just went down to let them know that they could get back to playing together, and this is what I found. He was fast asleep, snoring- burried beneath a blanket and a nerf toy that looks rather like a large, round face. My little guy!

Some of This and That....

2010-01-03T12:03:00.000-08:00

The kiddos staged an impromptu black-tie dance party in the familyroom this morning. This photo shows Avonlea trying to console her suited up brother after Amani refused to square dance with him. :(

Iknow that a lot of bloggers are working on the one photo for everyday project. I would love to participate -but I don't have much faith in my follow through right now. I will try to post more this year than last, and occasionally post just a photo when time is short.

HEALTH UPDATE:

Amani is doing very well. He is happy and his blood counts are always good. After they found the last lump on his ckull, we went back to an intensive chemo every week for six weeks. Now instead of dropping to every three weeks like we did last time, we are going every two weeks. He had the two weeks around the holidays off which was very nice. He did spend the first week getting the medicine out of his system but it was great not to have to drive to UCSF. He will go back tomorrow for his next dose of chemo and we will start a five day dose of prednisone. He seems to have a rash around his mouth that is "wart-like". They are all around his chin and near his eyes. The doctors say that they will go away when his body is better able to fight them. He's still about as cute as they come!

Not So Good News

2009-10-29T20:54:00.000-07:00

On Tuesday I noticed a bump on Amani's head. It was above his right ear. The little guy is ALWAYS bumping his head. We joke that he should wear a helmet! But something about the location and something in my gut was telling me it needed to be checked. I called UCSF and they wanted to see him right away. I quickly switched gears from what I had planned for the day, got Bret on board to watch the kids and set of for the city. When we got there they sent us right up to x-ray. I have spent enough time there that I feel like I can read the technicians pretty well. I have been right most of the time, knowing whether it is good or bad based on their manners, facial expressions, etc. I was feeling like it wasn't good news. I didn't want to get worked up though. It was very likely an injury. Right? We went back downstairs and had to sit in the waiting room before seeing the doctor. I felt like I was going to throw-up. When we were called in to see the oncologist, again I could tell. It wasn't good. She said she had bad news. It was hard to catch a breath. It is another lesion on his skull. It was able to grow during treatment. We are back to square one. We have to attack it again. They raised the dose a bit and we are back to the clinic for chemo every week and steroids three times a day. It is disheartening. We went back today to get started. He also had to have full body x-rays, again. His tiny body is really being out through the ringer. What will all this radiation exposure mean for him down the line? I had to hold him down. He cried and screamed. He is a great sport about everything, but doesn't like the scans or x-rays. He may also be getting tired of the whole scene. The nurses adore him and shower him with love and compliments. They think he is gorgeous. In a few days he'll be puffy and uncomfortable again. His treatments will keep going with no clear end in sight. I need to get back into a good spot about this. I feel so tired and discouraged. I'm sure it will all look a bit better tomorrow.

When Odd Becomes Normal

2009-10-24T10:11:00.001-07:00

I was thinking yesterday how quickly we adjust our lives when new things happen. For us, going to chemo, dealing with a grumpy steroid baby, administering medicine daily, etc. has all become our new normal. I can't even remember an adjustment phase. We just moved right into our new existence, and now it is our normal.

We have just been moving right along with what we have been told to do. Because LCH is so rare, I feel like I am blindly following the doctors at UCSF. There just isn't much information or choices in treatment. I've been feeling like we are in a bubble all alone with out a lot of outside input. Maybe that makes it easier.

The other night I was contacted out of the blue on FaceBook by a dad of an LCH child. I was connected with a network for families in our position. It was exciting and all of a sudden my world felt bigger. I spent a few hours exploring late into the night on blogs and websites, but that is a double edged sword. It allows you to connect with others in your position, hear hopeful stories, get encouragement and ask questions. It also clues you into the sad stories of toddlers passing away, hopelessness and despair.

I am torn between my bubble of ignorance and the bigger world.

What to do?

2009-09-28T20:01:00.001-07:00

What should you do when you have five kids? What should you do when you have a teenager with her first boyfriend, learning to drive? What should you do when you homeschool four kids and have a five-year-old with separation anxiety? What should you do when you have a 19-month-old son home from Ethiopia for five months who is four months into chemotherapy? What can ease the load, smooth the nerves and help you to relax?

You guessed it! Isn't it obvious what the logical thing to do is?

That's right! You should get a puppy! So that's what we did. :)

The Port

2009-08-20T21:54:00.000-07:00

The latest medical drama is that Amani's port doesn't seem to be working. We spent over four hours at UCSF on Monday trying to get his chemo. In the end, they had to put an iv in his hand! We had the port put in so that he wouldn't have to go through that. It was very sad - but as always, he was an excellent sport. The nurses joke about how hard it is to get him upset. We are actually on another iv chemo break until September 8th. He is weaning off the prednisone right now, and is down to only 2mg a day. He will stop completely until the 8th, and then will be on 20mg per day for 5 days, every three weeks. I have labeled the calendar in multiple colors so I won't forget which medication comes on what day and in what dose. He will remain on an antibiotic every Friday, Saturday and Sunday for many more months. He will get a CT scan in December to make sure that his treatment has worked. At that point we can start addressing the fact that the little guy isn't growing. The chemo has made him gain weight, but he really hasn't grown more than a half or quarter inch in the four months he has been home. But, that will be looked into at a later date!

Here is a photo that needs no more explanation than to say, "the boy has three sisters!" And boy did those sisters have fun with this Amani photoshoot.

Brothers

2009-08-01T19:58:00.000-07:00

I wanted to take a moment and talk about how wonderful it has been to watch the bond forming between my boys. Jordan was the little brother but never had a brother until Amani came along. It was all girls, all the time! I expected that the boys would be good playmates when Amani got a little older - but it is already starting to happen. They really love to horse around together, ride the plasma car, run, chase, etc. This was the relationship that started out a little rocky. After Amani having me to himself for two weeks, he was not at all pleased when we got home and Jordan jumped into my lap. In fact, Amani bit Jordan our first night home. Bret and I were so sad! We were devastated that Jordan would be greeted with an angry bite after he had expressed a lot of concern about my time and attention when I was in Ethiopia. There is still a little jealousy on Amani's part, but we are making it clear that there is plenty of "mommy love" for everyone.

On the health front, we are on break from iv chemo until the 17th and we are starting to decrease the amount of prednisone he takes everyday. In about two months they will do a full body scan to determine if the LCH has responded to the treatment.

I will leave you with pictures of the brothers. They are so sweet!!!!

And back up we go!

2009-07-12T14:25:00.000-07:00

Bret put a call in to the head doctor on Friday after our appointment. She had gone over the latest x-rays and his previous x-rays and feels that the spot on the arm was there before. They missed it. This is good news for the moment. Hopefully it means that it hasn't gotten bigger during treatment and that we can forge ahead with plan A for the moment. I am still guarded and don't feel that we are out of the woods by any stretch of the imagination. Though it is good news based on what we were thinking may be going on - it is bad news that there is indeed another spot. And if they missed this one initially, what does that mean? There may be other small spots that they missed?

We head back down tomorrow morning for his chemo treatment that was bypassed on Thursday and a heart sonogram to rule out other issues there. I am taking a deep breath and trying to relax and enjoy every moment.

He is just the best little guy! He is such a trooper and so happy! He is getting fatter by the day thanks to the prednisone - but he's still a cutie! Here are some photos from our trip out to Bodega Bay.

Always Something....

2009-07-09T19:15:00.001-07:00

We really try to stay positive over here about Amani's health issues. We are always remembering how thankful we are that he is here with us so that we can deal with his illness, and what a miracle it is that we got him when we did. In Ethiopia, this disease would be a death sentence. I am always very careful not to say this is "too much" or "what next?" even though I sometimes feel that way in the back of my mind. I know that we aren't given more than we can handle - and we CAN and ARE handling it.

However, I was prepared for lots of challenges. Or I had given them a lot of thought anyway. The adjustment to a new family member. The added stress of making sure everyone is getting what they need while the baby is attaching to us. Working with a new little personality with demands and opinions. Sleeping, eating, time, time, time! All these I had considered. But now we have the disease on top of it.

We were going along fine as I have said. The kids have been great. We have such amazing family and friends that have made it easy for us to pick up and head to UCSF for days at a time. Amani has been tolerating his treatment. He has gotten very puffy in the tummy and belly. He does get really amped up and is having a harder time sleeping. He does get aggressive and angry at times. His is very clingy and needs mom 24-7. But, we are kicking the cancer! Or are we?

I took Amani's clothes off to put him in the bath this morning and saw that the area on and around his port was bruised and swollen. I panicked and called UCSF and they told us to come right in. Well, they are two hours away so I got him right in the car and took off. I couldn't imagine what had caused the problem except maybe his carseat buckle being too tight?

We got there and they sent us straight to x-ray. This little guy has probably had about 30 x-rays so far and 2 CT scans!
he was a trooper for the x-rays and then we went back down to the clinic. They said that because his port area was so swollen they couldn't give him his chemo today and that we would have to come back Monday when it had gone down. Okay. AND....the x-ray technician thinks he sees another lesion. One they missed? Maybe, or maybe one that is new and is growing during the treatment. UHHGGGG.

So we go back Monday after they have had time to compare this new x-ray with previous pictures and see if the LCH is indeed growing through the current treatment. Chances are good that next week, when we thought we would start to taper off the medicine, we will be adding in another more powerful drug. :(

I don't know what that swelling was about. I was beating myself up early in the day thinking I may have inadvertantly caused it with the carseat buckle. If we hadn't been sent to x-ray today - we would have kept on with something that wasn't working.

I know I can handle it - but right now I just want to cry.

Family Photo

2009-07-03T12:22:00.000-07:00

We just had our first post placement visit from our social worker. It went very well and we asked her if she would take the last photo we needed to send in with our report, which is the family photo. This is the best one we got. Amani had actually fallen asleep during the visit!

We had his third chemo treatment yesterday at UCSF and they have now discovered he has a heart murmur. They usually wouldn't be concerned, but it wasn't noticed before. They think it's new which is a concern. After he got through his chemo treatment I had to take him down the street for an EKG. We don't have the results back yet. He isn't loosing his hair and his appetite is good. One of his main chemo drugs is a steroid so we have been experiencing grumpy, aggressive, "amped up" behavior which is not typical for him. Poor guy has a hard time falling asleep and staying asleep nowadays. His naps have all but ended unless we are in the car.

We are headed out to the beach house this weekend with friends and it should be a good time.

So Much to Report!

2009-06-20T21:00:00.000-07:00

It has been quite awhile since I last posted and so much has happened since then. The biggest news is that Amani started chemotherapy yesterday. He also had surgery to put in a port to make the process easier for him as his veins are small and very hard to get an IV into. We will be going to UCSF once a week for IV meds and have a number of pills and liquid medications we have to give him three times a day at home. His official diagnosis is LCH or Langerhans Cell Histiocytosis. It acts like a cancer, is treated like a cancer, but isn't a cancer. I haven't quite figured that one out yet. It is very rare. He has it on his scapula and his skull. It eats holes in the bone. The prognosis is very good - there is just a chance that it can become very chronic for awhile and need ongoing treatment. We are hoping to kick it the first time.

I will write more soon, but I will leave you with a few photos.

Mother's Day, Prom, Rope Making and More

2009-05-12T21:28:00.001-07:00

In an effort to keep up with this blog, I want to share some photos from Amani's first weeks home. In this photo montage you will see our beautiful daughter, Lauren, and her date, Max, before her senior prom. Our baby is graduating from high school in three weeks!

Here are a few shots of Amani having fun with his siblings. It is so much fun to realize, "Oh, wow, he's probably never played in a cardboard box before!"

We are home schoolers, and one of the things I like so much about it is the things you can be doing midday when everyone else is in the classroom. These are photos of the kids at a beautiful coastal property where they learned to make rope and shoot a bow and arrow. It was a fantastic day and Amani loved being outside and having his first picnic.

Mother's Day was lovely. We spent the first part of the day with my side of the family and the second with Bret's. My only mother's Day wish was that I would be given time to shower and put on make-up. My family made my wish come true! Here are some photos of Mother's Day fun, including Amani taking a nap on Sissy.

Lastly, some photos of our cute little 15-month old guy. He is just so precious and photogenic! He thinks I am so funny. I wish everyone in the house got such a big kick out of my antics.

Long Overdue 3am Mini Update

2009-05-09T03:27:00.001-07:00

Things have been SO busy since we have arrived home. We have been swamped with doctors appointments and just catching up with life and the kids. I had forgotten how consuming it is to have a little one in the house again! We are having fun and Amani is adjusting very well. All his blood and stool tests came back great - except that he is a little iron deficient - so we are working on that. Our amazing new pediatrician wants us to do one more blood test and one more stool test. We have started his immunization catch-up - poor guy starts screaming when we walk through the door of the doctor's office. We will have to go one day and not have anything hurt him. He does have a somewhat enlarged spleen and liver so we are working to get to the bottom of that. His diarrhea is finally getting a little better, but boy has that been a challenge!

I need to post about our trip to Ethiopia. I think I am still processing. It is also so hard to blog since I usually have a baby in my arms or on my back in the Ergo during most waking hours. Right now it is 3am and Amani woke up and needed to be soothed back to sleep -so I came in here to have a minute at the computer afterward!

Here are some of the photos that we used to create our announcement.

A Few Photos

2009-04-22T09:15:00.001-07:00

We Are Home

2009-04-20T14:16:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to let everyone know that we made it home safely on Saturday. The baby is doing great - I however picked up a bug on my way out of Ethiopia and have been sick since the customs line at SFO! I think the Cipro is kicking in, but Lauren and Bret have been taking care of the little guy without me. I will try to post photos later today. Thank you for all your love and support. It was an amazing and trying trip and I want to tell you all about it as soon as my head stops spinning! :)

News!

2009-04-16T16:53:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow, when we wake up, we are going to take a six-hour drive to meet Alazar's mother.
We are also coming home earlier than expected: the 18th instead of the 21st! And, we didn't even have to pay for the new ticket because the other flight had been cancelled. Just one more day before we go back home to the family!

Ethiopia

2009-04-14T11:34:00.000-07:00

We've been here with our little boy. He is very sweet and won't let me out of his sight.
Unfortunately, we do not have running water or electricity. We hope it will come back soon!

Alazar

2009-04-08T08:33:00.000-07:00

Just wanted everyone to know we're here safely. I've now had two days with our wonderful little boy!

On our Way to Ethiopia!

2009-04-06T09:13:00.000-07:00

We are about to get on the plane for Addis. We will meet the baby in the morning. We will be arriving at about 10am California time.

Our Last Day in Paris

2009-04-05T13:42:00.000-07:00

This is our last day in Paris. We take the train back to Germany tomorrow and then on to Ethiopia and our little guy!
The Army Museum

My mom at the army museum...

...and Me.

A fountain in front of St. Sulpice as featured in the divinci code?

Yum!

The Eiffel Tower. My mom and I climbed the stairs to the first level and saw the whole city lit up!

Saturday. We got out by 10 today which was earlier than we had been. We went to the pastry shop across the street. Mom got a roll and I got something called a divorce. We set off on what the woman at our hotel called a lovely 25 minute walk to jardin du luxembourg. We eventually arrived at the park a few hours later! We were looking to replace my camera charger before heading to africa. It hadn't been working. If was a wild goose chase bouncing from one set of french directions to the next. all the stores were so small and specialized. We finally made it to fnac (which was very "circuit city"-like) with the invaluable help of the shopkeeper in Vu D'ici where we bought some treats for Lauren. We ate a lovely lunch and got to St. Sulpice which was amazing. We continued to Luxembourg park which was charming! A toy boat pond. Carousel, tulips, bocce ball, chess, etc. I was able to finally understand and master the metro. We made it back to our hotel in about 15 minutes which included 2 transfers. The weather has been lovely. Today was a little cool and breezy but yesterday and Thursday were very warm. Everyone wears scarves even when we are feeling toasty. I think I have only seen one person in a t shirt and shorts (even though it was warm enough) and he was from Philadelphia! we hope to climb the Eiffel tower tonight and see the city lit up. Love. H
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Sightseeing

2009-04-03T08:24:00.001-07:00

Today we ate strawberry crepes and took the metro to note dame. It was breathtaking. My favorite sight so far. We climbed the 400 steps to the top of the south bell tower. We then walked through the latin quarter and had a meal and then some gelato. We then took the metro again back to our hotel. We have met many nice people. The pace here is very different. In the cafes they will take your order. Awhile later they will bring your food and if you want to see them after that you'll have to go get them! Lots of smoking! Hard to come by free water. A soda can set you back 6 euros. Haven't seen an suv yet. All tiny cars and motorbikes. Parallel parkers will bump the cars in their way. Love. H & D

Here is the view outside our hotel.

At Notre Dame...

The view from the mid-level Notre-Dame tower.

gargoyles...

From the top of Notre Dame.

Thank-you for all of your blessings and well-wishes! I can still receive emails here if you'd like to send anything directly to me as Lauren is forwarding comments from home.

Our First Day in Paris

2009-04-02T13:23:00.000-07:00

Today we slept very late after being awake for 26 hours. We left our hotel at 11 (Paris time). We walked down the rue cler and then to the eiffel tower. We didn't climb but we may go back. We walked along the Siene river. We visited the museum Orangerie where we saw works by Picasso, Renoir, Monet and Degas. We had crepës in the park. We had a few funny money scams tried on us....more details later. We saw the grand palais and the petit palais. We ended at the Louvre and saw the mona lisa and the venus de milo before they closed. At this point my great shoes were destroying my feet. Mom was still doing ok. We hopped on the metro and got part way back to our hotel. We walked the rest of the way. We had a great dinner with free water, which is hard to come by.

Paris

2009-04-01T20:38:00.000-07:00

We have arrived in Paris by means of limo, airplane, regional train, high speed train and taxi. We have not slept in 26 hours. Paris is amazing. Our room is tiny. We are going to bed and we will see a lot tomorrow!

Leaving in the morning...

2009-03-30T16:09:00.000-07:00

I have been counting down the days since mid-January, and finally I leave TOMORROW! Here is a picture of the "pile" that has accumulated over the last few weeks. I have got to get it into the suitcases. I have been putting it off and now I must do it.

All our paperwork is notarized and packed - immunization affidavit, last years tax return, birth certificates, power of attorney from Bret, birth parent meeting agreement, passport, I-600, I-864 and I-864A, letter from Bret explaining why he isn't traveling, etc., etc.

I have donations of clothes, formula, antibiotics, anti-fungal cream, nasal spray, diaper rash cream, Tylenol, Neosporin, toothbrushes, toothpaste, floss, snacks, toys etc.

Now, I need to pack it all up!

Thank you to everyone for all your love and support. We hope to keep you updated during our travels. Please give Bret and my kids hugs if you see them.

Lauren is amazing! I have included a picture of her after her senior thesis presentation last Wednesday. She has really jumped on board to help and pick up a lot of the slack when I am gone. Thank you, Lauren.

Hopefully I will post sometime tomorrow to announce we have landed in Germany. Now I am getting excited!

Love,

Hollie

New Photos!

2009-03-28T18:22:00.001-07:00

Many thanks to Kirsten for taking these amazing photos of Amani while she was in Ethiopia!

She said that Amani was scared of her husband who was taking the pictures, thus the crying pose. He has teeth!

We are just so in love with him and so anxious to bring him home.

2 days until we leave!

Beautiful Africa Jewelry!!!!!

2009-03-25T17:18:00.000-07:00

These beautiful sterling silver pendants were designed by my mother, Dianne, to commemorate our Ethiopian adoption. This lovely piece is roughly 1"x1" and comes hanging on an 18" silver chain or an 18" black leather cord. I wear mine everywhere and get so many compliments! A glittering Tavalite Topaz heart sits right over Ethiopia! We are leaving the US on Tuesday, but would love to fill orders before then. The price is $59 plus $2 shipping. If you are interested please e-mail me at:

avonlea@comcast.net

and we will send one right out. My daughter will be available to fill orders when we are in Ethiopia.

Passed Court, Baby Shower and Leaving in 6 days!

2009-03-25T15:57:00.000-07:00

I am trying to become a better blogger now that we only have 6 days before we leave the US to go pick up Amani. So much has happened since the last time I posted. The most important news is that we passed court on the 20th and are officially the parents of our precious little guy!

Our embassy date did get bumped back from April 9th to the 16th. We decided that instead of changing all our travel plans we would just change our return date. So, we are flying out next Tuesday, the 31st, and stopping in Frankfurt. We will take the high-speed train to Paris where we will spend some time. We will board a plane on April 6th and fly to Ethiopia where we will meet Amani Alazar for the first time! We will be in Ethiopia with him for two weeks and fly back home on April 21st. While we are there we will be staying at The Ethiopia Guest Home in the capital city, Addis.

I am a mix of excitement and panic right now. I feel that there is so much to get done! I think of a new item to add to my "to buy" or "to do" list every hour. I am also nervous to leave my family behind. My WONDERFUL mother is going to be my travel companion - so that leaves Bret with the kids for three weeks. I have never been gone from Jordan for more than a night! I know they will be fine - but I will miss them so much. The queen of control in me has to let go, and trust that they will be well cared for and have a great time.

My wonderful friends and family through a beautiful shower/ bon voyage for me on Sunday. There was even a cake with Amani's picture on it! Everyone brought a bead and a message for the baby. It was really the perfect party.

My little guy...

2009-02-13T17:17:00.000-08:00

I am so grateful to have received news about my little one at the HOH. I am told by a visiting parents that he is big and healthy with long eyelashes! He IS walking! When this parent was visiting he was asleep and was pulling the blankets up over his head. Three of my kids slept this way when they were babies. It made me so nervous that they wouldn't be able to breathe, but they loved it that way. My heart longs to hold him, but I can't express the peace and gratitude I have felt by hearing accounts of folks who have actually laid eyes and hands on him. I am going to do my very best when we travel to bring as much information as I can to the families still waiting. It is invaluable.

WE'VE GOT A 12 MONTH OLD WALKER!!!!!

35 days until court.

39 Days To Go

2009-02-09T10:28:00.001-08:00

Happy Birthday, Amani!

2009-02-09T10:16:00.000-08:00

Today our little one will celebrate his first birthday in Ethiopia at the House of Hope. My heart is aching to hold him, comfort him and know him. We are going to go to our local Ethiopian restaurant with the family to celebrate - but the guest of honor will be missing.

43 days until court

2009-02-05T12:53:00.001-08:00

47 Days and counting.....

2009-02-01T15:53:00.000-08:00

We have 47 days left until our court date. I know there are so court dates from our agency coming up this week - and I hope a trend of passing on the first try begins. I have booked our flight and our guesthouse. It seems more real everyday.

I am the kind of person who always carries around a very long to-do list. Sometimes I joke that if I spent as much time doing things on my list as I do transferring my list and making it longer - I wouldn't need a list anymore! My newest list is "Things that need to be done before March 31st". March 31st is the day we are scheduled to leave. This list is very long, but at least it is only the most pertinent items. It feels great to cross off "book Flight" and "book guesthouse". Today I have also been able to cross off "baby shower invite list to Carrie", "wash Amani's carseat cover" and ""wash Amani's clothes".

There is a family in Ethiopia right now that may look in on our little guy when they are at Numan. I would be so thrilled to get any news. CHI has also promised photos - although with our baby at Numan, I worry that we may be last on the list for photos.

Here are a few pictures from Av's 9th birthday. She picked out a cat from the shelter as her gift. It is a great cat. We all love her!

Hair Continued.....

2009-01-26T08:07:00.001-08:00

I just wanted to sat that during her "break", Olivia fell asleep and slept for 2 hours. when we started back in she was much more equipped to deal with the situation and really held it together quite well. We wrapped up hair day at about 7:30pm. A and J were already in bed! Here is the finished product - I hope we get a few weeks out of it.

Olivia's Hair

2009-01-25T11:21:00.000-08:00

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Today was a hair day. It comes around every two weeks or so, and today was the day. I needed to take out O's current hair-do, wash it, comb it and re-style it. She is not a happy camper. It went SO badly that right now she is in her room laying down to take a break. I love her hair. It has taken about 4 years for it to get to its current length. We are able to do all kinds of fun things with it - but it is labor intensive. Four to five hours per session labor intensive! It is thicker than anything I have ever felt, except for maybe a lamb. As a little girl, we kept it very short. She would look at Avonlea's hair and say she wanted straight long hair. She would put tights or leggings on her head most days to have the feeling of "long hair" down her neck and back. I have learned a lot over the years and my process gets better and better as time goes by, but it's still no fun for her. At the salon is even worse. We've done that a few time and she cried and screamed in the salon. The stylist would tell me this is part of her life and that she better get used to it and toughen up. So now she has her long hair and she is begging to take it all off. She wants to go back to the very short "boy hair" (her words) that she used to have. I am torn because I know how long it takes to grow. I know that she could change her mind. Part of me if very excited at the prospect of making the hair routine so much easier, especially with the baby coming. I feel that it is a bit of a strain on our relationship because I am the hair person. My husband could never do it in a million years, bless his heart. In fact, I have told him if anything ever happened to me he would need to make her a standing appointment at the salon for her so they could keep it up. My older daughter gave it a shot once and lasted about 10 minutes. So I am the evil hair lady so as she screams how mean I am and how she needs to get away from me - it makes me sad. Because she is in a play right now, we signed a contract saying she would not change anything about her appearance until the show closes. So we can't cut it today. In a half hour, I will try again and hope we can get through it and wait another two weeks before we have a hair day again.

Exciting Times!

2009-01-21T08:12:00.000-08:00

This was quite a week - and it's just started! We spent Monday studying about Martin Luther King, Jr. and his life's work. We read about Rosa Parks and Ruby Bridges. The kids and I watched Dr. King's "I Have a Dream" speech and the speech he made a few days before his death. One of the things I love about home schooling is learning along with the kids. I had never watched the speech he made days before his death. It was so prophetic. I spent a chunk of our learning time in tears. The kids went with my parents in the afternoon to a local peace march put on by the Baptist church in honor of the day.

Then Tuesday, history in the making. An event that Martin Luther King had dreamed about. I spent a large part of yesterday in tears as well. I feel excited and renewed. It does feel like a new day. I can look my adopted children in the eye and assure them, in all honesty, that they can aspire to be anything - even President. WooHoo!

We have been talking a lot about how long this wait has become. We are still almost 60 days out from our court date, and so many of them haven't been making it through the first time. I belong to some other Ethiopian adoption boards, and it seems to be a problem for everyone right now. In the event that we don't pass court on the 20th, I am going to travel anyway. I do have children here that need parenting, but I also have a baby there who needs a mommy. Bret and I think it is best if he stays here and my mom and I go to be with Amani for as long as it takes. This is a thrilling and terrifying prospect for me. Of course, I am praying that we pass court on the 20th and there will be no need for plan B - but if we don't pass, I'm not going to wait any longer to be with him.

Interesting fact

2009-01-12T13:23:00.000-08:00

I was just double checking our fingerprints to make sure that they are good through our tentative embassy date, and I found the official date of our CIS approval. Our I-171H was dated March 20, 2008. Our court date is March 20, 2009. One whole year later! I am taking the matching dates as a great sign. :)

WE HAVE A COURT DATE!

2009-01-12T12:34:00.000-08:00

I am very pleased to announce that we have a court date of March 20th! Our tentative embassy date is April 9th - the day our little guy turns 14-months-old. Of course I wish I could leave tomorrow, but it is nice to have an actual date to move toward. It seems more real with each step and each call. It seems more real today than it did yesterday. I feel more motivated to get things done. I know it will be even more real when we pass court.

Time to organize this house from top to bottom, and arrange a romantic weekend away!

A Better Day

2009-01-10T16:04:00.000-08:00

I was feeling pretty down when I wrote my last post. I was sure not prepared for the range and intensity of emotions that come along with this amazing process. I appreciate all the kind words of encouragement. A few of you really changed my perspective for the better. I was also able to drive down to the East Bat today and meet with a mom and her gorgeous baby who have been home from Ethiopia for over 6 months now. Her daughter is from the same orphanage and she was kind enough to bring me photos and stories which did make me feel more at peace with the situation.

I did want to clarify that my main concern and reason for upset was that our referral paperwork said our little guy is being fed diluted cow's milk which didn't make our pediatrician very happy. I was hoping he would quickly get to the HOH and some improved nutrition.

But it's a new day - and I have a new attitude. Thanks again for all the kind words - they are very helpful and valued!

Sad Today

2009-01-08T07:40:00.000-08:00

I am very sad today. I just got an e-mail back from Erin at CHI and she told me that our little guy is not at the HOH. He is still at his orphanage. This makes me very sad.

Weird, Wonderful Days

2008-12-30T11:41:00.000-08:00

I am in a weird spot. The high of the referral is fading slightly, and there is plenty waiting to take up that place in my head. There is the longing to bring our baby home that becomes unbearable at times. There is the worrying about EVERYTHING! Our baby, his health, his location?, his happiness, his ability to adjust, the unknowns of travel, when will we get a court date, how will my other kids do, the need to organize and plan, but what and when, etc, etc. I have fallen down with the flu. I know that stress is not a friend when you are trying to stay healthy.

The holidays were a little surreal. Family and friends are very supportive and excited but I keep hearing "you mean you have to wait even longer now?" Yes. We have to wait longer now, knowing our babies face, name and that he is getting older everyday. We have to wait. What should I be filling my time doing? How can I be most productive and keep my emotions at bay? Just like everyone who has gone before us, I knew this would be the hard wait, but now I feel the weight of it all. Now the wait is real.

*******************************************

We have named our son! We had actually picked out this name very early on - but now we have decided to go with it. His birth names will be middle names (can't share those yet) and his first name will be Amani, which means "peace".

Here are a few holiday photos. We hope that everyone had an amazing holiday and that the new year showers more blessings on everyone!

Hollie

We Have a Boy!

2008-12-17T07:51:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was our big day! I had resigned myself that we would not be hearing anything until after CHI reopened on the 5th of January, and then we get the call!

The kids and I were having a very slow day at home. We had done math and reading and I had taken a break to start some laundry. I was actually having a bunch of odd thoughts like, I need to find the camera and make sure it's charged so that when we do get our call we can take "in the moment photos" like I see on everyone's blogs, so I found the camera. The phone rang, and I didn't make it in time (which happens a lot when we are in the middle of our school day), but I started to wonder if it was Erin. I had never thought that before. I began to wonder if you could be skipped over if they couldn't get ahold of you. Then I sat down at the computer and saw that another CHI family had just received a referral after waiting 32 weeks. I did the math - 8 months - and realized we were still weeks away from hitting that marker. I then thought, if we did get a call, I should look nice and not still be in my pajamas for those "in the moment" photos. I never got that far.

The phone rang and I answered it. It was Erin and my heart began to race! Bret was already on the other line and so I knew for sure. I motioned to my daughter to grab the camera I had just charged and to take photos of me as I got the news, standing there looking very homely, but excited, in my pajamas.

That is when Erin told us that we had a little 10-month-old boy! We were gasping, crying, smiling, the kids were dancing, it was great fun. When we got off of the phone, I sat down at the computer and we saw his sweet little face. He was dressed in pink from head to toe. He has the most amazing, huge brown almond shaped eyes, not any hair to speak of and a gorgeous little face. The happiest part of my day was hearing Bret in awe, teary eyed saying, "he is gorgeous! Isn't he beautiful?"

Of course I read about his situation, and like so many before me, it broke my heart. I hadn't planned for the conflict between being so happy and so sad at the same time. I had forgotten for a moment that our son was coming to us because of great tragic circumstances. My heart was breaking for this baby, his mother, his country. It was hard to reconcile - and I am still working on it - I assume I always will be.

Avonlea and I split the call list and let all of our friends and family know that we had our match. I called Dr. Nancy Curtis, the international adoption pediatrician in our area, and I am hoping to talk to her today. CHI is overnighting the acceptance forms and I am hoping to get them back by Friday so they will go out before the CHI closure for two weeks. The hardest part of the wait has begun. and we couldn't be happier!

Once, again, I am sorry for the unkempt look and the pjs.

More Sound of Music Photos

2008-12-15T08:46:00.001-08:00

7 Month Marker!

2008-12-15T08:37:00.000-08:00

When we started out on this journey, I remember trying to prepare myself for the longest possible wait. I had estimated, based on what was happening with our agency at the time, that if I chose Christmas as our "longest" - then I would not be disappointed. I remember telling everyone, "we should have our baby home for the holidays" thinking that it would really be much sooner than that. I was wrong. Here we sit, less than two weeks away from Christmas. We do not have a referral. CHI is closing down for two weeks starting on the 19th. Many families with referrals still don't have court dates - and the court dates they are currently handing out are for February. This is the first big "funk" I have found myself in. Now I find myself hoping that we will not run up against the rainy season again - and that isn't until August!

I was having a hard time as we went last Friday to get our fingerprints done. My husband reminded me that our child will come to us when our child is ready. He said we don't want to lament or rush, because the divine plan is in place. I know he's right - but I feel so antsy!

I need to refocus on taking advantage of this time to get organized and do all the little things that will be much harder when a baby is in the house.

We are waiting for you baby - in your own time.

Hollie

"The Sound of Music" has ended!

2008-12-05T13:31:00.000-08:00

We are finally getting back to normal around here after our two week run of "The Sound of Music". It was a lot of fun with sold out shows every night - but it was a big time commitment. It had been about five weeks since I had been home for my little ones at bedtime when all was said and done. I thought I'd share some photos.

We are one week away from hitting the "7 months" waiting marker. I bought a crib the other day. We moved our two youngest into the same room so that the baby will have some space. Our kids have never shared a room before, but it is going well. I have a girlfriend who is asking about throwing us a shower. Is this real? I know it is - but it all feels so strange.

6 Months!

2008-11-14T11:25:00.000-08:00

We have hit the magic 6 month marker! It is so hard to believe. We started this process a year ago - and we feel that we must be very close to that referral call. I have to say that with four kids at home already, the days have flown by. I can't believe we are here already.

Avonlea and I are completely consumed by "The Sound of Music". We open on Thursday, and for anyone familiar with theater, we are in tech week right now which is very long hours and very draining. We have been getting home every night around 11:30pm. Av is a trooper and is holding up remarkably well.

Jordan was cast in a commercial that was filmed on Wednesday in Carmel. Because of our rehearsals, Daddy was the one who took him. They left a day early and had a mini vacation that included the aquarium, an IMAX movie and room service. They had a really good time.

Olivia has been cast in the play "The Miracle Worker" at the junior college and she is very excited about that. This will be her first speaking role on the big stage.

Lauren has just been cast as Eliza in her high school's production of "My Fair Lady". She will do an amazing job.

I wonder if our new little one will have the performing bug like these guys do? I can't wait to see this new little personality join our family.

Here is a picture of the kids with their cousin, Luna, at the SF Zoo pumpkin patch.

Halloween!

2008-11-01T12:40:00.000-07:00

We had a great Halloween, despite the fact that it was raining here. At least it wasn't very cold, and the kids had a blast. Our local firehouse hosts a free spaghetti dinner downtown and the we walk through the family friendly, not too busy streets near there. We have been so busy this year with "Sound of Music" rehearsals, that we actually carved our pumpkins last night before we went trick-or-treating. This year Av was a black cat, Olivia was a puppy and Jordan was some kind of sports guy. His jersey looked like that of a basketball player - although it said "baseball" on the front. By the time I put a long-sleeve shirt on under it and pants on under his shorts and he had thrown on a guitar cap on his head - he was a bit of a mish-mosh. Here are some of the photos!

Today we are off to rehearsal, an audition for "Miracle Worker" and my nephew's 15th birthday party. Let's pray that everyone can make it until 9pm without any huge meltdowns.

*Hollie

The I Love You Song

2008-10-23T10:34:00.000-07:00

Here is our next song and video! The kids are having so much fun making these and seeing the finished product. Bret and the kids wrote the song together and then Avonlea sang lead and Olivia & Jordy sang back-up. Our old lab Asia even got to make a cameo appearance.

Our family adoption song

2008-10-14T08:43:00.000-07:00

Here is our latest video project. Bret wrote this song and then Lauren learned to play it and the kids each sang their own parts. Our family knows what it is like to wait for that call - and to know that your baby is out there waiting for you. Please share this video with any family that you think would enjoy it. I am so proud of my wonderful children!

About the Video

2008-10-12T22:01:00.001-07:00

My 8 year-old Avonlea and my husband made this video when I was in the city with my two youngest last Thursday. They wrote the song together, my daughter sang it and then they made a video that my hubby edited. I think it came out really great! They are already working on project number two which will include little brother and sister. Incidentally, the morning after this video was made, Av woke up sick with stomach cramps and vomiting. I couldn't believe how much dough she consumed while they were filming. Hope you enjoy!

My Daughter's Music Video

2008-10-12T21:56:00.000-07:00

2008-10-12T21:55:00.001-07:00

Backyard Camp out!

2008-10-12T12:21:00.000-07:00

Last night the kids and I slept in the backyard in our tent. I am trying to remind myself to say "yes" to them as often as possible. Kids are always hearing, "in a minute", "maybe later" and "not right now" from grow-ups. When they came to me and asked if we could have a camp out - most of me wanted to say "not tonight", "maybe when it gets warmer" (like next summer!) and just plain "no guys". But I took a deep breath and said yes. They were so excited! We had a great time. Daddy made roasted marshmallows in the oven which were actually amazing. We watched a movie, giggled, snuggled, etc. I froze all night. I kept hearing odd sounds that I know were just chestnuts dropping off the trees. But I did it - and it was fun. Everyday I am adding in more "yes" and less "no". Not as much laundry gets done. The floor really needs to be swept. We are behind a day or two on our math - but it is worth it.

I had these ideas about everything I needed to get done before we add baby - making our home a family of seven. All the things on my list were about the house, shopping, schedules, home improvement projects and the like. I think that all we need to focus on before we bring the baby home is being extra sure that everyone feels secure and loved. Making time for EVERYONE should be the goal above making time for EVERYTHING.

Many families in our agency have been receiving referrals at 6 months on the list. We are almost at our 5 month marker! We are getting very close - so our new focus is going to be saying "yes" and enjoying the heck out of each other!

4 Months!

2008-09-17T19:47:00.000-07:00

It has officially been 4 months since our paperwork touched down in Ethiopia. At times the whole process seems so surreal. I got a little kick in the pants when I read that one of the recent CHI referrals was to a family who had waited just a little over 5 months. That is only 1 month more than we have waited so far. Wow!

We have been so busy here. I am fighting very high EBV blood scores and have been simply exhausted. Our home schooling is in full swing. My 8-year-old and I have been cast in a production of "The Sound of Music" at our local junior college, so rehearsals are most evenings. The kids and I went to the Chabot Space and Science Center today in Oakland. They have an amazing planetarium and lots of fun exhibits to explore. Here are a few photo highlight from the day.

Driver's Permit!

2008-09-02T23:07:00.000-07:00

Lauren passed her driver's permit test today! We walked out of the DMV at 4:30 this afternoon with that piece of paper in our hands. She will be 17 in December - and is taking the whole thing a lot slower than some. She doesn't seem to be in any hurry which is great for me. It is amazing to see your babies getting older and hitting these milestones that lead to adulthood and letting go. A number of her home schooling friends have left for college this month. She is growing up - into such an amazing, inspiring young lady.

Av was just cast in "The Sound of Music" as Marta at our local college. I was asked to play the Baroness - so it should be fun to be on stage together again.

A Mid-Summer Night's Dream in August

2008-08-08T21:13:00.000-07:00

We all went to see Lauren perform in Shakespeare's "A Mid-Summer Night's Dream" this afternoon. She played Titania, Queen of the Fairies. She did a beautiful job. She is an amazing actor, singer and dancer - not to mention the kindest, wittiest most intelligent and poised sixteen-year-old I have ever met! (I may be biased, but others will testify to the truth of my words.) I wanted to include some photos of our girl doing some of the things she does best.

The Waiting Game Continues

2008-08-07T09:37:00.000-07:00

Wow, time sure flies! I am so good about keeping up with reading everyone else's blog entries, just not so good about keeping up with making any of my own. This waiting period is such an odd place to be. It has been awhile since any referrals have come in, and it is such a feeling of being in limbo. In my head I know that our day will come, and we will have our baby - but it is off in the unknown future and part of me has a hard time wrapping my head around it. There are a few things that I have done, like gotten my shots, and had my mom (who will be traveling with me) get hers. I find it hard to know what else to do. I don't know when the call will come, which gender the baby will be, how old or anything. I really am not accomplishing much on the preparation front. I assume I have a long wait ahead, but it feels like I should be chipping away at something!

We are coming up on three months of waiting since our dossier has been in Ethiopia. Now with the courts closed, I feel the wait extending out in front of me. I am busy no doubt with my four kids and all the crazy daily activities - but I just hope I am not neglecting to do things that should be done during this time. I think it will sneak up on my and it will be a mad dash to the finish. Maybe that's okay?

Come on referrals!!!!! Yoo Hoo!

The photos are of our summer activities. Jordan and Avonlea are shown in their dance outfits for a show they were in at the end of June. Olivia is playing in the river at Family Camp which was a blast! Lauren is pictured at a summer pool party. It has been a wonderful summer that is quickly drawing to a close. We are still looking forward to a home schooling conference in two weeks and then our Lauren will start her senior year of highschool.

So Much Excitement!

2008-06-27T12:54:00.000-07:00

There have been so many referrals lately in the CHI ethiopia program. It is so exciting! One family who just got a referral said that their dossier arrived in Ethiopia at the beginning of March. I was thinking in my head that we probably won't hear anything until mid-fall - but I guess it could happen sooner. I called the travel clinic today to get rolling on my shots, just in case things keep rolling right along, I want to be ready!

Bret & Lauren (16) are boarding a plane in New York right now bound for Egypt. They are going to Cairo, and Asswan and on a cruise down the Nile. L has always been a big fan of all things Egyptian. She has all the dates, names, locations and history memorized. She does beautiful Hieroglyph style art. She is now going to get to see the country in person. Technology being as amazing as it is, they are able to send me photos from each location from their cell phone to mine. I am so thrilled for both of them. I do sure miss them though. I don't realize what a great team we are until Bret is gone for a day or two. This time he will be gone for over two weeks. I am trying to get as many projects done as I can to surprise him when he gets back.

Many congratulations to all the families who have been matched up with their babies this week. May those referrals keep on rolling in!

Chicken Adoption

2008-06-18T19:47:00.000-07:00

I was inspired to write today - even though our family is feeling sad. Last night one of our hens, and her three chicks flew over our back fence and got killed by our neighbor's dogs. We thought for most of the day today that they must be around, but my husband found the evidence this evening that they aren't coming back.

The reason I wanted to make this post was the amazing story behind these chickens. About six months ago we inherited a group of chickens from a friend of a friend who is battling brain cancer. They were mainly older hens, many past the point of laying. As the weeks went by, my husband noticed a "broody" hen in the bunch. This hen spent all day and night in the nest box. She wanted to hatch some eggs. We don't have any roosters, so this was never going to happen, but she persisted. She went days without getting up for food or water and we knew we had to do something.

My husband, on a whim, went to the farm center and picked out three two day old chicks. He brought them home and put them under her - not knowing what might happen. It was love at first sight for all of them! "Mama Grace" as the hen became known instantly took up care of these three tiny balls of black feathers. She kept them warm underneath her and lavished them with love and attention. Christina, Sally, and Kayla (as the chicks were named by our kids) fell in love with Mama Grace as well. They would ride on her back and stare up into her face with adoration.

The rest of the hens weren't so crazy about the chicks, so Grace and her adopted babies took up residence on our porch by day and in a dog carrier at night. They loved to spend time in our garden. Grace was fiercely protective of the babies - and was known to puff up and chase our lab, our kids, and my husband if she felt they were too close to her little ones.

When they were a month old, Christina was injured. We still don't know how it happened. She hurt her leg badly and couldn't walk when we found her. We were sure she wasn't going to make it and put her in a box in our bedroom. Grace was so distraught by this, that eventually my husband said he was going to give the baby back to Gracie and see what happened. She stayed with her injured baby, encouraged her to try to move and protected her all the while. Within weeks, Christina was up and around! She had an extreme limp that diminished over time.

Within the last weeks we were noticing that the chicks are almost as tall as their mama - and that these birds who were all black when we got them, were starting to develop brown feathers on their necks that resembled Grace's (a completely different breed).

So today we are mourning the loss of our pets - and remembering and sharing a beautiful adoption story. Grace loved those chicks as her own, and I'm sure she fought to the death to try to save them.

Man Time

2008-06-13T12:20:00.001-07:00

I find myself relating to all the stress so many families feel as they play the waiting game. My four kids do keep life so busy, that I don't find myself spending too much time "feeling" the wait. That being said, I am on the computer every day (or many times a day) checking CHI updates, reading family blogs and list serve postings. I check the ticker on our blog to see how the time is passing. I asked my husband yesterday, how long would he guess it has been since our dossier arrived in Ethiopia? His guess was "about 10 days?" It has been a little over a month! He is one of those people who really doesn't feel the wait, and will just be elated when the day finally arrives. I have to say, I am a bit envious :)

This is a photo taken of the girls 5 years ago! I know the wait for our little one in Ethiopia will someday feel like nothing, because looking at this photo, I don't know where those 5 years have gone.

OOPS!

2008-06-11T11:58:00.000-07:00

Here is the photo that was described but didn't show up.

Photos

2008-06-11T11:50:00.001-07:00

The first photo is of Av and J and "Cinnamon" the dog when we were in Sacramento waiting for our POA document to be authenticated. It was another great excuse to get out of down and do an overnight at the Hyatt. The kids had a great time.

The second photo is of Av, J and Olivia on a firetruck at our local Firefighter's Pancake Breakfast. The kids can't think of anything better than eating pancakes that a firefighter made in the firehouse. Watching the heliocopter land is always one of the highlights of the morning.

The last picture is of Olivia looking beautiful hugging a tree. (The hairstyle is only minutes old - and only took about four hours to do!)

It's Been A Long Time

2008-06-11T11:25:00.000-07:00

I had a feeling I would be one of those bloggers. My last post was about a month ago! When I was younger and tried to keep a diary, it was the same story.

Now that we are waiting, and all our paperwork (including the newly required POA) is done and sitting in Ethiopia, there isn't much to report.

What has been going on is that I have been enjoying - and spending too much time - reading other adoption blogs. I have also been introduced to the world of list serves and have been in contact with families in our area who are going through the process or have their little ones home already. I happened to find out that there is a weekly play group for Ethiopian adoptees and their families about 20 minutes away from our home! I have been so excited to hear about families who have received referrals, made it through court and are traveling. It is beautiful to see these families being created and knowing even though the wait seems long - in the scheme of things - we will in those shoes before we know it.

My husband and oldest daughter are getting ready for a trip to Egypt in the next two weeks. My 8-year-old is getting ready for drama camp and I am busy planning our home schooling for the next year. It feels good to be out of the school year and looking ahead at the summer. We go to family camp next weekend and a home schooling conference in August. It is going to be a great summer. and when we get to the end of it, three more months of waiting will be over.

Our Dossier is in Route to Ethiopia

2008-05-14T20:08:00.000-07:00

Erin from CHI just e-mailed us today to let us know that our dossier is on it's way to Ethiopia! The official wait has begun. The whole thing gets more real every day.

Every time we announce a new milestone to the kids they say, "Does that mean we can go and get our baby now?" It inspires me how children can be so open, so accepting, so ready for change and love and family in all it's forms. It makes me believe that there is hope that the world can be that way too. We are born with that ability and just have to find all the ways to preserve it into adulthood.

Mother's Day and My First Blog Comment!

2008-05-14T07:42:00.000-07:00

It is such an exciting thought that by next Mother's Day, I will have another precious child in my life!

Both Bret's family and my family are local, so for us that means double holidays. This year, Bret's mom decided to do their Mother's Day celebration on Saturday so that we wouldn't have to be two places on the same day. It was nice being with family on Saturday by the pool and BBQ - and then a nice brunch with more family on sunday after church.

I got the girls matching dresses - as this may be the last year I can get Lauren to do something like that! Jordan had a dress shirt with similar colors and they all looked so cute!

After spending the day with the kids - being mom like any other day - I decided to treat myself to a movie marathon in the afternoon. I went to see "Maid of Honor" and "The Visitor". I highly recommend "The Visitor". It was one of the best movies I have seen. I was tempted then to see a third movie, but it was after 9pm, and I was tired, so I went home. It was lovely though to get out all by myself, and then to come back and appreciate home even more.

I got my first comment on my blog yesterday! I have been checking and it finally happened. Thank you Angie! We are on the CHI blogroll now, so I hope to more officially join the community.

Sacramento Photos and the Infamous "Semi-Formal Photo!

2008-05-09T21:16:00.000-07:00

Our Dossier is in D.C.

2008-05-09T21:01:00.000-07:00

So much has happened since my last post. I guess that is what happens when you wait a month and a half! On Tuesday, April 1st,(April Fool's Day no less), we received our I-171H in the mail. We were elated. The kids wanted to know if that meant we could go get our baby now. Bret and I celebrated by going out for a celebratory dinner and a movie, which we do once in a blue moon. We saw "Run, Fatboy Run" which was so cute. So the there we were with our home study done, our fingerprints done, our I-171H in our hands and our dossier complete - except for one little part - the semi-formal photo. Why wasn't it done already? Why did I have such trouble getting that photo taken? Here we were, all ready, except that pesky photo was missing. You'd think at that point I would have run into the house, showered, put on a nice outfit, make-up and sat down to have Lauren take the photo, but I didn't. I was having such a mental block about that photo! I am sad to say that by the time the photo had been taken, printed and the whole package had been approved by CHI, we were at the 23rd of April.

On April 24th, Av and I drove to the Hyatt in Sacramento. We swan in the pool, ordered room service and watched a movie in our beds. First thing in the morning we walked past the Capital Building to the Secretary of State's office and had our dossier authenticated. What a wonderful feeling! It was a great little trip, too. The funny part was that on the way to Sacramento I turned on our navigation system to get us there and find the hotel. Something was wrong with it, and no matter what I did, including turning off the car and restarting it, I could not get it to turn off. The last place we had used it was driving to San Francisco. So, the whole two hour drive to Sacramento the voice kept telling me to get off the freeway and make a u-turn. I could not turn it off, turn down the volume, nothing. It was crazy-making - but it also makes a heck of a story!

2008-03-12T12:37:00.000-07:00

Photos of our little bedbugs!

CIS Fingerprints are done!

2008-03-12T12:11:00.000-07:00

Bret and I went in yesterday and got our CIS fingerprints done. It is so exciting that we are so near the end of the paperwork phase of the adoption process. We are waiting on one letter of reference to be notarized, and my mom is coming over this afternoon to take a "semi-formal" photo of Bret and I for the dossier. We originally sent our application in to Children's Hope right after Thanksgiving, and now here we are. I remember very early on someone telling me that if you were really on top of things, and treated the dossier like a job, you could get it all done in about 3 months. It has been more like 4 months for us, but the end of the paper chase is in sight!

We had a great weekend, and are just getting adjusted to the time change. Av and Liv were in a little play yesterday called "BedBugs". It was very cute. They did a great job. Lauren opens her show "Footloose" this Saturday and it will run for two weekends. We are looking forward to seeing it.

I am getting all the fliers in the mail right now for summer camps and classes. I can't believe that I have to start planning the summer schedule before Easter. As soon as the dossier is totally finished, I will jump on the summer plan.

2008-02-28T11:34:00.000-08:00

We just got a call this morning that our home study is done! Adoption Connection will be sending it to Children's Hope and CIS by early next week. I am so glad another big step in the process has been completed. My mom, who will most likely be traveling with me to Ethiopia, got her passport photos done yesterday.

I keep trying to map it out in my head and see if I can come up with a rough estimate of when we will meet the baby in Ethiopia, but of course I can't. I am thinking it will probably be in the fall. Maybe October or November? It's so hard to wait.

Hurray for the home study!

2008-02-26T09:29:00.000-08:00

Bret left for Canada yesterday. There is a man there named Tyler who is doing a documentary on colon cancer, and Bret is essentially the star of the movie. He is a colon cancer survivor and has a huge network of cancer survivor friends who Tyler also ended up featuring in the movie. Bret will be up there for the week helping with some last minute edits and voice overs.

I went with my best friend Carrie to the notary yesterday to have her letter of reference notarized. I didn't notice until I got home that the notary's commission expires next month! That is not going to cut it for our dossier, so we will have to make another attempt.

We are waiting on the final of our home study so that we can send it over to CIS. I am starting to get a little antsy. Up until this point there has been lots of paperwork to keep me occupied, but now things are slowing down, and I want to keep the momentum going.

Here is another picture from our wonderful weekend in Tahoe.

2008-02-24T09:33:00.000-08:00

Hello! We are the Martin Family! This is my first experience with blogging, but I want to give it a shot. We are embarking on an amazing journey to adopt a baby from Ethiopia to add to our family of six. We are thrilled, and have been so moved by all the stories and families we have been able to follow online going through a similar process.

Let me start by introducing the family. I am Hollie, my husband is Bret, Lauren is 16, Avonlea is 8, Olivia is 7 and Jordan is 4.

We have been working on our international adoption since November, and have just finished our home study. Yeah! Now it is just a matter of putting the finishing touches on our dossier and waiting for CIS approval.

We just got back yesterday from a weekend in Lake Tahoe playing in the snow. The kids had a blast.